Tales of a Hillbilly Princess

Update

2009-09-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

Sorry I've been AWOL lately, life has been crazy. We've gotten in and then out of a contract on a house, shuttled kids here there and everywhere, and worked our butts off. Bird started kindergarten this year, and the first week or so was rocky but now he's doing wonderfully. Always comes home with reports of good behavior, and he's making all kinds of friends. Bug is a little lost without his "deedee", but is also enjoying his alone time with my Nan.

And finally, for the big news...I'm getting married next Friday. :) HHF's divorce FINALLY finalized, and we're having a private ceremony next Friday, followed by a honeymoon, followed by a reception next Saturday. :) Which means that THIS Friday is my bachelorette party. Me and 10 or so of the girls are headed to the Big City to raise some hell. Look out C-bus, here we come!

...but she's still got a few miles left in her

2009-08-26T19:54:00.000-07:00

I've blogged about my Nan before, because I was a little worried she was losing her spark. Well, this week the old woman pleasantly surprised me.

She hates telemarketers with a fiery passion she usually reserves for people who shit on her family. For a while, she got to the point that she stopped answering her phone when she didn't recognize the number on caller ID. So the answering machine always kicked on, and that's when inspiration struck her. Her new message goes something like this:

"Hi, you've reached Miss Kitty's Porn Studio. If you are interested in a new career, please leave your name and address, and we'll send you an application. Be sure to enclose a nude photo when you send it back. You have a nice day now!"

If I did this, it wouldn't be nearly as funny. But out of my 68-year old grandma? Priceless.

2009-08-08T16:08:00.000-07:00

He was apparently ready, but I was not. My papaw died this morning. :( I haven't lost anyone really close for a very long time, and I'm not dealing well right now.

Realizations

2009-08-04T09:26:00.000-07:00

My daily commute is generally my time for reflection. This morning, as usual, I travelled the twenty minutes to work deep in thought, and during the course of this, I had two important realizations. The first is that my papaw is dying. He's been sick for a long time, and he has ups and downs, but always gets better. So since his latest illness, I've been telling myself he's going to get better, he always does. But it finally hit me this morning that this is the last time. I've been pushing it out of my mind, ignoring what everyone has been telling me about how there's nothing more the doctors can do, they're putting him in hospice, but it's going to be a long time...Then like everything does, it hit me in the car, alone, and I started crying. I realized that it's too late to talk to him about all the things I've been meaning to talk to him about and to visit all the times I've meant to visit.

The second is that I'm no longer fantasizing about suicide. I don't give off a suicidal vibe. Most people who know me don't realize how intensely depressed I can and have gotten at different times over the last couple of years. When I was contemplating leaving the ex, I frequently considered what would happen if I ran off the road and died. Would my kids be better off without me? Would anyone even care? Did I care? The fact that I couldn't definitively answer yes to the first question is the only thing that kept me from doing it. That and the fact that I wasn't sure if I'd actually die, and after watching my parents suffer from injuries from car accidents, I didn't really want to go through all that.

So this morning I hydroplaned a little. And I corrected and it was all good. But it hit me that I didn't have a brief moment of relief at the thought that this might be it. And that in fact, I hadn't contemplated it for a long time. Because even as frustrated as I got with HHF's divorce, and my job, overall, life is worth it. And at this point, it feels like it always will be.

Pancakes, Road Kill Style

2009-07-04T20:58:00.000-07:00

I saw him sitting there from about 100 feet away. I admired his tiny cuteness as he put his little paws up to his mouth and stuffed something in his cheek pouches. I watched him put his paws down and crouch as he became aware of my vehicle barreling towards him. I diligently guesstimated how to straddle him with my tires to preserve his tiny self in all his cuteness.

I am not a good judge of distance. My tire hit him like a rolling pin hits dough, or a pasta roller makes noodles. He was instantly compressed into a round chipmunk fur disk, which I gazed at, horrified, in the rearview mirror. A tiny segment of my day, but one I spent more time than appropriate beating myself up about. I make big decisions that affect people's lives everyday, but I agonized over the fate of one slightly suicidal chipmunk for hours. Rational? Probably not entirely. But the people I deal with have a lot more options than that poor chipmunk, who chose to hunker down and wait for me to pass instead of zigzagging around in a panic on the asphalt.

SURPRISE!

2009-06-05T16:29:00.000-07:00

I called my grandma to let her know I was on my way to get the boys. She told me Bird was really excited because he had a surprise. Boy did he.

A CAT. She got him a freaking kitten. Now when we move, we have Fat Cat, Fatter Cat (who's currently at the humane society but is coming once we're moved into our house), Big Dumb Dog (also at the humane society), possibly another puppy if there are boxers left, AND a kitten. Can you say menagerie?

And the important part of this post...we're buying a house if the appraisal goes well. We're waiting for the results. Keep your fingers crossed. Hence all the animals. I had to talk them into Fat Cat when I moved here and I promised no other pets. We had the illicit rabbit (RIP Halle Bunny) but she was mostly in the garage. Now that we're getting our own place, which is huge and in the country, we're making up for lost time apparently.

Aging

2009-06-03T18:19:00.000-07:00

Today I was following an annoyingly slow driver and I thought, "Why is this jerk driving like a grandma?" And I thought about how, when I was little, my grandma drove like a bat out of hell. I mean, 60 mph and hollering. Once, I was helping her move, and we got to the new house with a load, and she goes, "Where's my toaster?" I saw it on the way back to get another load. Her crazy ass had went around a curve too fast, and the toaster was roadkill. But that was before I could even drive myself.

Now? She drives like, well, a grandma. I hate moments like that, because it forces me to realize that she really is getting older. I wish I could freeze her in time, flying around the corners, tossing toasters off the back of the truck.

Chemical Warfare

2009-05-10T18:29:00.000-07:00

Everytime I know I'm going to have to spend an extended amount of time with my mother, I wear patchouli, because it reminds her of someone she doesn't like. Yes, I'm passive-aggressive, and yes, I'm going to hell.

You Can't Catch Me Because the Rabbit Done Died

2009-04-27T09:57:00.000-07:00

:( RIP Halle Bunny. We moved her cage out of the garage yesterday for the boys' party, and so she could get some sun and fresh air now that the weather has turned. When we checked on her last night, she was dead. No signs of foul play, we think the change was just too much for her. Bunnies are fragile.

How Freaking Lucky Am I?

2009-04-08T07:40:00.000-07:00

I know I complain on here a lot. I have a blog so everyone IRL doesn't have to listen to me bitching. But you know, I was laying in bed with the Bug this morning, because his own bed is NOT good enough for him, and I realized that I have some awesome friends, a fantastic boyfriend, beautiful kids, and a stable job I love, that actually pays the bills. And I had one of those so happy I almost burst moments. Then I kissed and squeezed Bug, who promptly squeaked at me, rolled over, and commenced to drooling on my pillow. :)

Birdisms, Vol. 4

2009-03-04T04:14:00.000-08:00

He was talking to my grandma today about my other grandparents and said "Even though they're old like you, I love them anyway."

Thank god he likes the old folks, he's picking out my nursing home.

Dear Grossly Obese Lady at My Gym....

2009-02-25T16:36:00.000-08:00

Props to you for coming in and working out everyday. I know it's hard for me to come in and work out and look at the skinny bitches everyday, and as improbable as it is for me to see myself that way, I probably AM one of those skinny bitches to you. So good for you, and I wish you much success.

Me

Dear Lady Parked Next to Me at the Walmart...

2009-02-17T18:50:00.000-08:00

And I use the term "lady" loosely to include white trash skanks that are exactly what most people think of when they think "hillbilly" and totally make the rest of us look bad.

Your daughter gave me the sweetest little smile as I backed out of my parking space. It'd be even cuter if you'd put out your cigarette, actually strapped your kids into some carseats, and take those babies home and wash their little faces and wipe their noses. Which probably wouldn't be running if you didn't have them sitting in the car with the window cracked as you slowly poison them.

When I pass that law requiring a license to be a parent, you'll be the first one I prosecute.

Get your shit together, please.
Me

HHBisms

2009-01-29T19:14:00.000-08:00

"There's no such thing as fake titties. If I can touch them, they're real."

He says he learned it from his brother, the Manwhore. Wow. I'm so lucky. *eyeroll*

Birdisms, Vol. 3

2009-01-28T07:38:00.001-08:00

Due to the weather, the power has been flickering all morning. I was in the kitchen getting Tim some string cheese and it flickered again. Then I hear Sam from the living room say "MOM! I just clapped and made the TV come back on." I said "Yes, you're magic." And now he thinks he can make the power come back on if it goes off.

Snow day!

2009-01-28T06:06:00.000-08:00

I cannot rub this in enough...it's a grownup snow day here in the big HC! We're on a level 3 snow emergency, which means if you ain't in an ambulance, you shouldn't be driving, lest you wind up in one, so my work and a lot of others are closed. It's like ODOT threw up their hands and said, "Fuck it, you win snow. Take over the streets and highways." I for one do not mind, unless my power goes out. Then I'll brave imminent arrest (it's cool, I have a badge) and slippy slide to my grandma's for heat.

This post brought to you by...the letter H!

2009-01-25T18:16:00.000-08:00

LiLu always has the fun ideas, like TMI Thursday and this one, which asks you to write ten things you love that start with your randomly assigned letter. Mine is "H".

If you want to participate, leave a comment on this post and I will assign you a letter. You then write about 10 things you love that begin with your assigned letter and post them on your blog. When people comment on your posted list, you give them a letter and the chain continues on and on.

1) HHB of course. Also of course not his real name, but it's what I call him here. Even when we fight and I feel like punching him in the throat, I still adore him.

2) Hillbillies. They get a bad rap, but the honest to god hillbillies I know are hardworking, honest, loyal people. And yes, they have all their teeth. That Snuffy Smith stereotype is just as offensive to those of us who are actual Appalachians as blackface is to African-Americans. Think of that next time you start telling some joke that involves a "Billy Bob" and less than a full mouth of teeth.

3) Hippy poptarts. That's what I call them, but they're really organic poptarts I got at TJs the first time, and then I found them in the organic sections at Kroger and Giant Eagle, also. Some of my mommy board friends sneer, but I love that they're whole grain and the fruit tastes like...fruit. What a novel concept.

4) Halle Bunny. She's our pet rabbit. We keep her in her hutch too much, but she's a little bitch sometimes when we try to get her out of the cage. She doesn't always appreciate that we're trying to do right by her.

5) Heat. I'm freezing about 80% of the time. The rest of the time, I'm snuggled under the covers with HHB.

6) Health Insurance. I haz it. Finally. I've been uninsured for over a year at this point, and that was after a period of about a year of being insured, which was preceded by, you guessed it, no insurance.

7) Home. I'm not here nearly enough, so I appreciate every second that I am.

8) Hellboy. Both movies. I have a ridiculous attachment to them, even though they're goofy as hell in places. I pink puffy heart Hellboy.

9) HC, my stomping grounds. I love it here, it's good to be a big fish in a little pond, and it still feels as good to be back home as it did four years ago when the Ex and I moved back down here after I finished law school. I am not cut out for the big city. It's nice to visit, but I can't live there.

10) Humping. Not what I usually call it, but it fits the category. I never do anything even close to this kinky, (nor do I want to) but I got this video on my MySpace and it's so hilarious I have to share:

And because I'm feeling generous, some things that start with H that I don't like. Hickies, hookers, hypocrites,the hours I keep these days, and my HUGE ass.

Come play!

Birdisms, Vol. 2

2009-01-19T12:51:00.000-08:00

This morning I was trying to change Bug and Bird was like, "Mommy! Mommy!" until I finally said "WHAT?!" in my cranky voice.

"Oh, you didn't get your sleep out, did you, Mommy?"

LMAO. No, no I didn't.

Bugisms, Vol. 1

2009-01-18T07:53:00.000-08:00

Bug just held up a Build-A-Bear box, looked at us questioningly, and said "Yeowh."

Fortunately, HHB and I are fluent in Bug, and HHB told him "NO, we're not putting the cat in the box!"

Poor Floyd.

Sigh

2009-01-17T17:38:00.000-08:00

How can it be that two people as madly in love as we are fight so fucking much? Maybe I really am too difficult to ever make anyone happy. :(

He signed!

2009-01-10T13:37:00.002-08:00

YAY!!! Now I just have to sign and have my signature notarized and witnessed, and then file with the court. They'll set a hearing within the next two months, and I should be divorced by March or so!

"I swear"

2009-01-09T16:24:00.001-08:00

That's what he said. "I SWEAR I'll get the paperwork to you tomorrow."

That was last night.

It's 7:30 p.m. Guess what I don't have?

I'll keep you posted.

Complete and utter douchebaggery.

A Prayer

2009-01-07T18:58:00.000-08:00

Dear eight pound, six ounce, newborn baby Jesus, don't even know a word yet, please save me from those who know too many words and use them to say the mostly socially retarded things imaginable.

Amen.

Birdisms, Vol. 1

2009-01-04T17:37:00.000-08:00

Today we did a belated Christmas with my grandma. Sam looked at her manager scene, and told my mom, "That baby looks dead!" What do you say to that, really? Well, here's what my family said:

My mom: "You can tell he doesn't go to Sunday school." (Without judgment, in her defense.)
My grandma: Big sigh.
Me, my dad, and HHB: Hysterical laughter. Yes, we're going straight to hell.

Soup fight!!

2008-12-31T13:49:00.000-08:00

Okay, that's supposed to be like food fight. HHB saw my "No Soup For You" post and is STILL adament that they didn't force me off the couch. I ask if you could sit on four square inches of couch. Because my ass is too big for that. He's started his own blog, just in case he needs to bitch about me. Bring. It. On.

One thing down

2008-12-30T18:15:00.000-08:00

My cousin is doing okay, her hubby just messaged me on MySpace. No blood clots, and he said call tomorrow. That's a relief, I was worried about her. Now once I get the other things figured out, all is well.

My hart. It hurtz.

2008-12-30T15:46:00.000-08:00

That's LOLSpeak for misery. Why am I miserable, you ask? In the order that they occurred to me or I found out about them, not the order of importance:

1) The budget for my office got cut substantially from what I asked. It was already as tight as I could make it. I may be able to get more money at the end of the year, but I hate depending on that possibility.

2) It appears that there will be no going away anything for me at the office. I didn't expect a big to-do, but a luncheon or a little festive get together for fifteen minutes to say goodbye and good luck and make an effort to at least pretend they'd miss me would be nice. :( Four years of my life, and my boss is like an uncle or something, you know? It's not like I work for MegaCorp. Maybe I'm jumping the gun on the self pity and they'll do something tomorrow, but no one has mentioned anything.

3) My cousin is 30 weeks pregnant and in the hospital. She's been having chest pain and trouble breathing and they think it could be a blood clot, so they're watching her. Please keep her in your thoughts, this is her first baby and she's already overwhelmed. And her husband can't take care of himself, as sweet as he is, so he's probably worried about her and/or starving to death.

After my grandma called me, I felt like a whiny little shit about the office thing. It's just a hurt feelings thing, I'm not pissed, and I WANT to be cool about it, but I can't. Damn Pisces emotional personality anyway.

NO SOUP FOR YOU!

2008-12-29T18:36:00.000-08:00

HHB and Spider Monkey just pushed me off the couch. HHB started a game for Spider Monkey, then sat down with me, and suddenly Spider Monkey was up in the middle and I was squeezed into four square inches. So I moved to the chair. Then HHB gave me the stink eye for suggesting that Little Wolf could clean off her own bed. So I think the kitchen is closed this evening if you know what I mean.

Complete and Utter Douchebaggery

2008-12-16T16:17:00.000-08:00

I just found out that the Ex might have made some piss poor financial decisions that could have cost me my new job. I think it's straightened out, but now people think that I'M financially irresponsible and I've been embarassed in front of my future bosses. I cannot stress enough how much I want to punch him in the throat right now. I hate that my name is still on some of his bills and he can take me down with his sinking ship.

Um, Pantyhose?

2008-12-12T18:37:00.000-08:00

Spider Monkey just looked at me and said "What's wrong with your LEGS?!" I busted out laughing and said, "Honey, they're pantyhose!" And he goes, "What are pantyhose?"

Jesus, Gollum, dress up once in a while, your poor kid doesn't even know what hose are!

Ninja Warrior

2008-12-07T06:26:00.001-08:00

Bird is now into "Ninja Warrior" on G4. This was HHB's doing. He says what's the big deal, now he's interested in getting fit. (Note, mind you, that HHB made fun of me for my penchant for watching "American Gladiators" on ESPN Classic.) I say when he starts climbing the curtains, which is an actual Ninja Warrior event, you'll be sorry.

A Clue For You

2008-12-02T22:28:00.000-08:00

So I'm toying with the idea of doing this new thing periodically, where I try to help men figure out women. Because I'm the expert you know, being, well, a woman. Clearly that means that I know what ALL women want, just like I know what all white people want...all attorneys...all moms...you get the idea. (BTW, there's a whole blog titled "Things White People Like" or something like that, if you're interested in a little funny.) I know the concept is a little presumptuous. But maybe, just maybe, as a way of giving all men a clue, I can help HHB deal with the constantly changing array of moods that is me. So really this is about me and him, couched in a more general "What Women Want" kind of style. It all comes back to me, because this is my freaking blog, the one place in the world where I can indulge my inner attention whore. And yes, I know some of you are saying "inner"? What INNER attention whore, that's all on the surface. Bite me, bitches. ;)

Today's clue is...

Women want to be taken care of. Hold your horses, girls, I'm not done. We like being taken care of. What we don't like is being made to feel like we HAVE to be. So indulge us, pamper us, but always let us know that YOU know that we could do it ourselves. It's not that we can't, it's that we deserve not to have to.

By way of being taken care of, we enjoy sweet emails, phone calls for no reason, and small things almost as much as the big gifts. Note, however, that these are NOT substitutes for nice things for Christmas.

A Fairy Tale....

2008-12-01T20:48:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time there was a moderately attractive princess who had a new-to-her carriage that she loved very much. We'll call her Princess Passive-Aggressive, because well, she is. Anyway, Princess Passive-Aggressive and Prince Hot Hippy Boyfriend were driving home from a trip to the Magical Fairy Land mortals call Black Friday, when a foolish Frog who shall never, ever become a prince drove his carriage right out in front of Princess Passive-Aggressive's beautiful new-to-her carriage, smashing it all up. Now Princess Passive-Aggressive has to depend on Prince Hot Hippy Boyfriend to transport her to and from work until Evil Frog Boy calls his minions and tells them they are in fact his minions so that they'll pay for a rental carriage. Princess Passive-Aggressive is more aggressive than passive at this news. She wants to step on the evil Frog and squish his awful froggy guts right out of him.

Where is the happily ever after, you say? Stay posted. I'll let you know when I find out.

O rly?

2008-11-26T07:34:00.000-08:00

Bird came to work with me today. He got up this morning and came in my room, and when I lifted the covers for him, he said, "No, I'm not coming to get in bed, I'm coming to remind you I'm going to work with you today!" Oh, if only it were that exciting for me to come here everyday.

In the car on the way in, I asked him what he wanted Santa to bring him. The following conversation ensued.

Bird: Um...I want a MONSTER TRUCK!
Me (thinking fast): I don't think Santa can fit that on the sleigh.
Him (thinking faster): He could just DRIVE it!
Me (still on my toes): What about the reindeer?
Him (reminding me why I should have had more caffiene before embarking on this conversation): He could tie them to the back.
Me(still not admitting defeat): What about the sleigh?
Him: He could tie it to the back, too.
Me (with my ace in the hole): What about the presents?
Him: He could put them in the trunk. Do monster trucks have trunks?
Me (feeling more hopeful): No, they have beds.
Him (clearly not understanding that lots of things could be hauled in a truck bed): Then Santa could drive ANOTHER car with the presents.
Me (jumping up and down with glee on the inside, I have him now): How can Santa drive two cars at the same time?
Him: Because he's MAGIC!

DAMN DAMN DAMN!! How did I get outsmarted by a four year old? Santa is supposed to be on Mommy's side, always!

Laina Wazowski

2008-11-25T08:01:00.000-08:00

Bird drew a picture of me this morning. I had a head with arms and legs sticking out of it, like an M&M:

Or Mike Wazoski:

He does love Monsters, Inc., but I guess this is a normal stage kids go through. I told him to make a second, bigger circle for a body. He drew Garfield. HE got a body. Maybe I should have told him to use a triangle, otherwise I'll end up looking like Mommy the Snowman. Or Fat Mommy. Okay, that hits a little too close to home.

And now they're being adorable...

2008-11-23T06:55:00.000-08:00

Sigh. Why do they do this to me? If they were just beasts all the time, I could run away and never look back. But Bird's playing with his trucks, and Bug is laying on the floor watching Noggin. Oh, wait, now he's coming over to torment the cat and climb on me. Hold the train!

Lord Help Me.

2008-11-22T16:41:00.000-08:00

HHB has to work two twelve hour days this weekend (he's on this weird rotating schedule where he has to work two weekends out of five). It's just me and Bird and Bug. Bird actually hung out with my grandma part of the day, but came home around 3.

After dealing with them all day, I'm ready to tear my hair out. They're really good till about 6:30 or 7 usually, and then all hell breaks loose. For the last hour, if one of them wasn't screaming, the other was.

I owe my Ex some super good Christmas cookies for all those weekends he watched them while I was campaigning. I know they're his kids and his responsibility too, but right now they're lucky they're too old to qualify for the safe haven law. I'm sure he had days like this with them, and he never once complained. So extra cookies for him.

Guy was awesome!!!

2008-11-20T08:36:00.000-08:00

But the rest of the food show was a bit of a let down. Not enough samples, free or otherwise. I wanted to eat my way through all that Cleveland had to offer. :( I had to get Chipotle on the way home. Maybe next year will be better. But Guy was funny and great about audience participation and just an all around stellar guy. (No pun intended) Watch his Food Network shows, he's awesome.

The Exchange

2008-11-20T08:32:00.000-08:00

Well, Saturday went pretty well, considering. Evil Ex (who shall henceforth be referred to as Gollum for her resemblance to said character) pulled up, cigarette hanging from her lips as usual, and I got the stank eye as soon as she saw me in the driver's seat. She somehow managed to not speak a word to HHB as he herded the kids into my mommymobile. The only snag occurred when Bird said, "Mommy, who's that girl in that other car?" I said, "That's Spider Monkey's mom." His eyes got huge and he said, "But MOMMY. She's BAD!"

Do you know how hard it is to shush a four year old while trying not to laugh?

Just a note in my defense--I did NOT tell him she's bad. I haven't even spoken about how bad she is in FRONT of him. He hasn't liked her since May when he thought he wasn't going to get to play with Spider Monkey because she was engaging in her usual douchebaggery. What can I say, my kid is a good judge of character.

Oh Good Times

2008-11-14T16:25:00.001-08:00

The beasties and I are going with Hot Hippy Boyfriend to get his kids tomorrow. Since he got home in July, I have managed to avoid contact with Evil Ex, which is probably good after the incident when he was home in May on leave and she called me a whore. The urge to stab her in the face everytime I think of her is damn near overwhelming, god knows how I'll overcome it when she's actually in front of me.

My greatest fear is that she'll say something snarky about my boys. They're perfect of course, but she's not above saying something about them out of spite. After all, she did basically call my youngest a bastard. (No, he isn't, in case there was any doubt.) Hot Hippy Boyfriend (who was then just Hot Hippy Best Friend) was not even in the country when Bug was conceived. Anyway, all of you that have kids know that when someone goes on the attack against your babies, that red lens goes down across your eyes and all you can think is "kill kill kill". Add that to the already present urge to do stabbity things and I'm thinking Hot Hippy Boyfriend should have invested in a Hannibal Lector suit before he takes me in her vicinity again.

But I'll just grit my teeth and keep reminding myself what I was telling someone on Facebook today. A good life is the best revenge, and the only thing she rocks harder than me is Guitar Hero. And that's only because I have a job, friends, great kids, and Hot Hippy Boyfriend to occupy my time, so I don't get a lot of practice. I'd feel sorry for her...except my brain is still screaming "kill kill kill" for that bastard campaign she went on.

I'm so there!

2008-11-14T07:43:00.001-08:00

The food show! We're going to see Guy Fieri and wander aisles and aisles of glorious food, cooking utensils, and all things food and cooking related. I am SOOOO psyched that I'm talking like a HS student. From 1995. Sorry about that.

I will make an effort to actually take a camera and take some pics for Monday.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-12T20:09:00.000-08:00

I just found out there is a HUGE food convention in Cleveland, and the boys will be with their dad all day Sunday. I smell a ROAD TRIP in the works! And if it all works out the way I want, I'll even get to rub my little cousin's growing belly. Now all that's left is to get Hot Hippy Boyfriend on board. Shouldn't be too hard, I have means at my disposal.

Back to Blogging

2008-11-12T08:28:00.001-08:00

I have too much pent up bitching to NOT blog, so I'm back to blogging. I think I was underground long enough for my cyber-stalking problem to cease, so hopefully I'm in the clear and can be my frank, snotty self again. Stay tuned!